The Real L word

20 05 2011

5 reasons why the reality TV show, the Real L word, gets on my nerves!

One – are there any women of colour in LA? Any blacks and browns? I don’t know since I have never been there but maybe someone can tell me how come not one of them were “real” L word people?

Two – what is this obsession with mothers? I mean, I know we all love our mothers, biological or not, but what’s the acute obsessiveness with them also being your best friend? I am not sure if that’s healthy! I mean, my mum is my mum and my best friend is my best friend – I don’t confuse the two!

Three – The Real L word couple planning a wedding and getting married were like “oh my god!” They woke up in the morning and got on to their identical matching macs and started planning the wedding? Every day?! Jesus. What on earth will they talk about and do once the wedding is over? There surely is more to their relationship than that! Well if there was, we sure didn’t see it. Oh and don’t forget the chandelier!

Four – does anybody have, like, a “real” job? I mean, yes, fashion and TV production are jobs but does any one work in more regular industries? Or regular hours? Or hours at all? Is anyone a teacher, a nurse, a social worker or something a little more regular than producers of LA fashion week! (“My biggest and largest production ever”, we were reminded over and over again!)  I mean the world is in recession and people are starving everywhere not to mention the hundreds of natural disasters that occur every year, and you are worried about what to wear? Jeez, just be glad you have clothes!

Five – what is the obsession with small rat-like dogs and where are the lesbian cats? Lesbians have cats, don’t they? But obviously not in LA! And who the f*** will let a dog lick the inside of your palette! Dogs don’t use toilet paper remember!

But yes I watched it all – just so I could rant on this blog. Hope the second season is better!

The 7 questions you always wanted to ask lesbians*

24 09 2009
  1. How did you become lesbian? The same way you became straight.
  2. How do you find girlfriends? I use pheromones
  3. What do you do in bed? Please read the graphic description provided here.
  4. How do you have sex with a woman? How do you have sex with a woman or man or whoever it is you do it with?
  5. Did your parents fighting make you lesbian? I wish. I would be assured of most women around me turning lesbian!
  6. Are you a man hater? Yes, but I would like to state here that I love my father, brother, male cousin, two gay friends, my ex-boss, my guru the English professor and the boyfriends of my three best friends.
  7. Who is the man in your relationship? If I wanted a man, why the fuck would I be lesbian?

*For further information on lesbians please read a book or surf the net.