Calling all Butch Lesbians

14 12 2009

At least one criterion under Checklist 1 must be fulfilled as a pre-requisite by Candidate for above post, in addition to the criteria under the Secondary Checklist.

Checklist 1

Please select a minimum of one of the following categories. It is not possible to pre-empt, circumvent or vent them in any way:

  1. You were born a lesbian
  2. You realized you were a lesbian later on in life. However, you have documentary proof that you never liked men
  3. You liked women before identifying as lesbian. However, due to unmentionable but understandable pressures, you were in the emotional state frequently described by professional lesbians as ‘denial’*

Secondary Checklist

Please check at least 8 (including 1 & 2)

  1. Wear men’s clothing or unisex forms of dress (e.g. of unisex clothes: kurta, skinnies, linen pants)
  2. Exhibit  walk with no signs of movement that can be classified as swing, sway and/or sashay
  3. Wear your hair short cut in a men’s hair salon and/or the men’s section of a unisex hair salon by a male hair stylist
  4. Walk disdainfully past the women’s clothes section and shop in the men’s section in clothing stores
  5. Store  enough stationery in wallet to enable one bulging butt
  6. Indicate revulsion when asked to wear make-up, sari, skirts**
  7. Socialize with men at the level generally accepted as ‘buddy’
  8. Demonstrate very little cooking  skills OR level of culinary skills considered near professional
  9. Prove regular attention from attractive non-butch females at social events
  10. Sport accessories in the following categories: leather or steel arm bands,  rings without flowers or heart designs, wristwatches preferably 1’ in width

PLEASE NOTE: Bonus points will be given to the candidate if she was refused entry to a popular nightclub on Duplication Road, Colombo 04 at least once (conditions apply***)

*Reports of candidate liking men during the period of denial will not be taken as evidence of being a non-butch lesbian at present

**If in doubt over a particular item of clothing, it must be submitted to unanimous approval by a minimum of 3 Butches

***Candidate must have been refused entry without any explanation and must be able to name witnesses to the event

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9 responses

14 12 2009
L G

I fulfill the pre-requisite criteria,

Secondary check list , ALL 10!

Bonus : Never had the chance to try the club U have mentioned. So I don’t get the bonus point

Am I a good candidate ?? 😀

15 12 2009
vatura

i think you went straight (?) to the top of the list 🙂

15 12 2009
varad

another things is i have noticed many dykes wear their watches on their right wrists (even if they are right handed!)

15 12 2009
buwa

This is an insightful analysis of a butch.. Should be incorporated into the book on ‘ A glance at Varied Sexualities and the Sexual Orientation – an Introduction’
🙂

24 01 2010
me

i’m confused by the stationery in the wallet thing?

26 01 2010
Vak

It’s to do with some butch lesbians (and men) in Sri Lanka who store everything from old petrol bills to the business card of someone you can’t remember to a copy of your birth certificate in their wallet, so that eventually, the wallet assumes a round appearance and makes one butt bulge out disproportionately 😉

26 01 2010
me

ahem yes … check that one too then. a perfect score.

19 03 2010
Kay Paiva

Hey there,
I think this might be related to a project I’m doing. It’s called The Butch Project. I’m collecting experiences, stories, etc. from butch identified women and transmen. I’m hoping it will be published (though that is much further in the future). I hope you will consider passing this along, since I feel the butch voice is dying out these days. =(

I’m looking to create something that might bring it back together.

E-mail me if you’d like to submit or have questions,
kaypaiva@gmail.com

19 03 2010
Kay Paiva

Thanks!

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